;-{) " Purported Epstein Suicide Note Is Released"'

[Goonch]

"A federal judge has released a suicide note purportedly written by Jeffrey Epstein that was sealed for years as part of the criminal case of his cellmate.

“They investigated me for month — FOUND NOTHING!!!” the note begins, adding that the result was charges going back many years.

“It is a treat to be able to choose one’s time to say goodbye,” the note continued.

“Watcha want me to do — Bust out cryin!!” the note reads.

“NO FUN," it concludes, with those words underlined. “NOT WORTH IT!!”

Mr. Epstein’s cellmate, Nicholas Tartaglione, said he discovered the note in July 2019 after Mr. Epstein was found unresponsive with a strip of cloth wrapped around his neck. Mr. Epstein survived that incident, but he was found dead weeks later at age 66 in the now shuttered Metropolitan Correctional Center in Lower Manhattan.".......
https://www.nytimes.com/2026/05/06/nyregion/epstein-suicide-note.html

[Kid Berwyn]

1. Doesn't read like, "So long!"

It reminds me of how Dallas police, after a previous search of Ruth Paine’s home, conveniently found Oswald’s alleged travel plans to Mexico City in an old Life magazine.

[spanone]

2. Nice try, guys.

[gab13by13]

3. Fuck That

Release the Epstein autopsy

[ColoringFool]

4. It Reads and Sounds EXACTLY LIKE TRUMP!!!.........

The whining: "NO FUN!" The self-pity. The hyperbolic "FOUND NOTHING!"

The bad grammar and random capitalization.

BUT MOST OF ALL, THE TIMING OF ITS SURFACING. GMAFB.

[Zelda_Orchid]

5. .

[gab13by13]

6. Post of the day

Made me laugh out loud, thank you.

[usonian]

7. Draft of note found in White House trash bin.

THIS IS GOING TO BE THE BEST SUICIDE EVER.

Obama tried and FAILED MISERABLY.
Biden COULDN'T TIE A NOOSE PROPERLY.

I ALONE CAN DO IT RIGHT.
USA!! USA!! USA!!!

Send my best wishes to President Donald Trump. THE GREATEST PRESIDENT EVER.