Iowa Man Busted For Measuring Self With Ruler

[47of74]

Here comes Iowa Man, roaring back to life and all ready to challenge Florida Man.

An Iowa man was arrested last night for allegedly measuring his penis with a cardboard ruler while at a urinal inside a college library bathroom.

Police collared Thomas Morgan, 42, on a misdemeanor indecent exposure charge in connection with a May 7 incident at the University of Iowa’s Main Library in Iowa City.

Morgan, cops say, was inside a restroom when he “partially turned his body towards the victim/witness who was using a urinal in the bathroom.” Morgan then “measured his penis against a cardboard ruler,” according to a criminal complaint.

The victim told a cop that Morgan subsequently “made a comment regarding his size.” The man added that atop two of the urinals there were cardboard rulers with “dark sharpie markings regarding penis size.”

[johnp3907]

1. Bad reporting.

Left out the most important detail. I mean it might seem like a small thing, but......

[Kaleva]

2. You'd think that the University of Iowa would have wooden rulers in the restrooms.

[47of74]

3. Nah, we use tape measures.

[Kaleva]

4. Tape measures bend and can give one a false measurement

Stiff sticks are the best.

[47of74]

5. Only if you're doing it wrong.

Besides after a certain point it gets kind of awkward to carry sticks that long around.