It's the holidays again. Yay.

[happybird]

I have a lot of time off work this week and next. It makes me very anxious to have that much free time. It’s like a big, yawning black hole ahead of me, laying in wait.

We were closed yesterday (Saturday, one of my usual 10-12 hour work days), and are closed tomorrow and Tuesday for our usual “weekend.” Then, I have 4 days off in a row next week (Sat, Sun, Mon, Tues.) Ugh. My coworkers are all thrilled for the time off to spend with their families. I’m at a loss for what to do. So anxious just thinking about it. Not to mention the loss of income.

I used to wonder why so many people disliked the holidays. Since I’ve been sober, it has occurred to me that I used to love them because of all the parties. I stayed drunk and high the whole time and didn’t carry around this huge load of guilt and shame. Dealing with my family is a lot more difficult without the numbing buffer.

I’ll muddle through. I just hate feeling like this.

[Skittles]

1. hey

fun times can be had without drugs or alcohol....

do you like reading, for example.....get a good book and make some cocoa and RELAX

if you get super anxious, take a long hot bubble bath.....start thinking about what you have instead of what you can't have....remind yourself what a great accomplishment sobriety is

if you ever, EVER feel like you are falling off the wagon talk to us here on DU, someone is always here

[happybird]

2. Thank you

I’ll be all right, I just don’t like this big of a change to my schedule/structured week, especially when combined with mandatory family time. It’s a double whammy.

I think in the past few years the 25th didn’t fall a day or two before out usual “weekend” days, so I didn’t have such a long stretch of days off. I love my family very much, but preferably in small doses. We’ve already seen a lot of each other the past couple weeks, and under stressful (finance related) circumstances.

When I’m working I feel good and useful. Productive. And I like that my boss and coworkers trust and depend on me. I’m not so great at managing time when left to my own devices. No danger of relapse, more a danger of getting too far inside my own head. Then feeling guilty because I didn’t get a damn thing done except lay around with the cats reading and messing around online. The cats will be very happy though, lol!

[Skittles]

3. I absolutely hear what you are saying

I have noticed that when I work I don't have the time to dwell on my issues - for whatever reason, they just get put on the back burner, because I take pride in doing a good job. So what we have to do is find ways that help take our minds off our issues when we are NOT working. I find that exercise helps - taking a really long walk, for example. And never forget that days spent doing nothing but surfing and hanging out with cats can be very therapeutic too! I keep a list of things I need to get done and if I skip stuff on a "lazy day" I add another chore to the next day.

[RainCaster]

4. I'm chairing the Christmas day AA mtg...

So that the regular chair can spend it with family. My family is rather messed up right now, so I am helping others instead.

This is a good time to focus on others; find a meeting, help a food bank, take an armload of blankets to a homeless camp. You get the idea. You will put a smile on someone else, and the diversion will be good for you.

[multigraincracker]

5. Keep moving and stay busy.

Run, walk or crawl. Spend time on any or all of your healty passions. Turn off the tv and listen to the radio, at least you can still keep moving. I've been retired for 20 years and that keeps me going and growing. Every day is a weekend or holiday for me.

[GPV]

6. I hear you. Too much food for me, and I'm home sphere the bingeing and purging happen. I have

a hobby, but it’s triggering because of the perfectionism.

Here’s to all of us getting through and finding joy somehow.

[bif]

7. Load up on the movies!

Either from your local library or on line. It's a nice, therapeutic diversion to keep you from thinking about drinking (or your drug of choice). Hang in there!