Republicans aren't Real™ christians because...

[beam me up scottie]

5 votes, 0 passes | Time left: Unlimited
	They don't read their bible
	2 (40%)
	They do read their bible but only pay attention to the parts they like
	0 (0%)
	Historically christians have always been peaceful folks
	0 (0%)
	Hitler!
	0 (0%)
	Scotch goes well with that moral superiority complex
	3 (60%)
	Atheists are the most insecure people I know
	0 (0%)
	F*ck off bmus
	0 (0%)
	Dawkinz!!1!
	0 (0%)
	0 DU members did not wish to select any of the options provided.
Show usernames Disclaimer: This is an Internet poll

[deucemagnet]

1. Other. NTS.

It's because the Republicans don't share the same interpretation of Christ's teachings that the True Christians (tm) hold, and these True Christians (tm) know that their interpretation is more valid that that of the Republicans because of some Other Way of Knowing (tm) or Knowing in Their Hearts (tm), or something.

[beam me up scottie]

3. That's why I included the Scotch option.

Although your expanded explanation does makes sense because True™ christians aren't hypocrites either.

[deucemagnet]

5. Ah, I missed that.

I've changed my vote.

[bvf]

2. I don't think "only pay attention to the parts they like"

applies only to Republican christians. It seems to apply to them all, regardless of political affiliation.

[beam me up scottie]

4. Exactly.

#2 is the hypocrites' favourite.

[mountain grammy]

6. Torn between Hitler and Scotch.

chose scotch.

[beam me up scottie]

7. AMC is the place to be on Easter Sunday!

Hell with that Biblepalooza!

[Heddi]

8. You forgot "Oh, your furious responses indicate I must have hit a nerve!"

[beam me up scottie]

9. crap

I was so insecure I couldn't think straight.

I'm behind on persecuting christians; tell HQ that I'm doing my best.

[Heddi]

10. Well maybe if you weren't such an arrogant Atheist you'd see the error in your ways

I mean, just because you see Science as a Religion doesn't mean we all do. I mean, babies...how do they work?

[beam me up scottie]

11. That book your father and I gave you explains all that.

Last edited Sat Apr 4, 2015, 02:31 PM - Edit history (1)

Can't we all agree that right wing memes have a place on DU?

[Heddi]

12. Can't we all agree that Science is a religion?

Sure, you could ask "why" but "why" is a question for religion. Duh. Go wank to Dawkins, whydon'tcha

[beam me up scottie]

13. Why ask why?

When you can look at teh pretty picturz....

Or as Carol would say "Look at the flowers, Lizzie...".

[Curmudgeoness]

14. I wanted to go with "f*ck off bmus"

but there were too many other good choices. So that means you did good.

[beam me up scottie]

15. Thanks!

I included that one because I was trying to be considerate of others' fee fees.

[Curmudgeoness]

16. You are so kind to think of others.

Can those others vote in polls here?

[beam me up scottie]

17. I think so.

Though the obsessive use of the alert function seems to occupy most of their time.

[Heddi]

18. Uh oh

On Sat April 4th 2015 4:14pm an alert was sent on the following post:

I think so
http://www.democraticunderground.com/123038517#post17

REASON FOR ALERT

This post is disruptive, hurtful, rude, insensitive, over-the-top, or otherwise inappropriate.

ALERTER'S COMMENTS

Quite obvious that BMUS (if that is her real name) is a total slut whorebag Atheist. If only she would find the saving grace of the LORD and SAVIOR JESUS CHRIST she might not be such a bag of hot air (and sluttery). Please, jury, please shut down this poster and SHUT DOWN THIS THREAD can I get an amen? Can I get a hallelujah!? Oh and fuck Dawkins.

You served on a randomly-selected Jury of DU members which reviewed this post. The review was completed at Sat APr 4 2015 4:14pm , and the Jury voted 17-22 to LEAVE IT.

Juror #1 voted to LEAVE IT ALONE
Explanation: Oh jesus.
Juror #2 voted to HIDE IT
Explanation: How do babies work? I just don't get it
Juror #3 voted to HIDE IT
Explanation: Please! She should be allowed to marry her hamster if she wants. OR HER BIKE. Hide.
Juror #4 voted to LEAVE IT ALONE
Explanation: I like sluts
Juror #5 voted to LEAVE IT ALONE
Explanation: I'm an atheist, but.
Juror #6 voted to HIDE IT
Explanation: When everyone tells you you have a tail, it's best to turn around and look. LOCK!.
Juror #7 voted to LEAVE IT ALONE
Explanation: I concur with Juror #4.

Thank you very much for participating in our Jury system, and we hope you will be able to participate again in the future.

[Jeff Murdoch]

21. .

[beam me up scottie]

23. !

Last edited Sat Apr 4, 2015, 05:00 PM - Edit history (1)

strangling. on. my. coffee.

Heddi, your existence almost makes me believe there is a dog.

Ah have FAITH in the jury system!

Ah BELIEVE!

Some folks just can't seem to accept that truth.

[edgineered]

27. 17-22, hmm, looks like they alerted the grand jury

[Curmudgeoness]

28. OMG!

You have gone too far this time!

[progressoid]

30. The jury system is rigged!

[Manifestor_of_Light]

34. Funny!

Calling somebody a slut is sexist. However, tarts are useful. Nothing wrong with being a tart.
I think a tart is a selectively flirtatious woman.

Sharon Osborne said she was "an old tart"!

[Jeff Murdoch]

20. I was going to go with this one,

just so you didn't get all arrogant and such, but went with Scotch.

[beam me up scottie]

24. Arrogance is one of my favourite things.

And except for when I post on DU I'm more of a gin/vodka slut, uh, gal.

[edgineered]

19. It was never in the belief system of a Real(tm) xtian that violence is acceptable.

It is only the bad, bad atheists throughout history that are willing to persecute and nail others to a cross. That is why laws such as RFRA are needed to educate people. now where is that sarkist button?

[beam me up scottie]

25. LOL!

[LiberalAndProud]

22. Sorry. The ones I know really haven't read the Bible.

The really crazy stuff they believe isn't even in there.

But they sure do Share the God memes. (I can't thank them for that enough.)

[beam me up scottie]

26. Some of it is.

Our local baptidome is led by a whackjob who can quote scripture to support every single hateful thing he believes.

And then there's the Catholic Church's homophobia...

[Manifestor_of_Light]

35. Hilarious! "Baptidome"

I called First Baptist Church of Houston Megabaptist One.

Second Baptist Church was Megabaptist Two. They spent something like $35 million some years ago building a new sanctuary on Woodway and Voss. Wonder how many poor people in Houston they could have fed with that money.

Don't get me started on "Pimpleface" Joel Osteen. I have never seen him say he contributes one dime to charity or has established any charities. They took a perfectly good basketball arena (The Summit) where I have many fond memories of rock concerts (Frank Zappa, The Who, Bruce, U2, The Police), and turned it into their megachurch with a sweetheart deal renting it from the City of Houston for peanuts.

I am more qualified to be a Protestant minister than he is. He dropped out of Oral Roberts U. in Tulsa after one semester. I took 2 religion courses at a Presbyterian college. Six hours of religion was required as part of your liberal arts education. It was very mind-expanding and the professor was an amazing linguist. The courses were not about doctrine or theology. They were about sociology and history. Thank you, Dr. Frank Garcia.

[beam me up scottie]

36. But he's so pretty...

ugh.

Everything about that man screams fake fake fake.

Makes you want to smack the snot out of him.

[Manifestor_of_Light]

38. Agreed.

I'd rather not slap him, because then I would have to touch his ugly face.
I'd use something a bit longer range like a flame thrower.

His wife, Victoria, is a real piece of work too. She allegedly went ballistic at a flight attendant on a plane once and they hushed it up.

[progressoid]

29. "Atheists are the most insecure people I know"

[beam me up scottie]

31. I will hear that song in my head until the day I die.

Good thing I like it!

[progressoid]

32. When my sister-in-law saw the Narwhal/Sprint commercial,

she said, "is that an internet thing?"

She was more surprised to find out that narwhals were real.

[beam me up scottie]

33. I love it when I get the opportunity to explain something new to people.

Do you remember Calvin and Hobbes? You know how Calvin's father used to explain things to him?

I live for those moments.

It's a straw, sissy.

They need it to breathe through the ice, see.

[progressoid]

37. Do I remember Calvin and Hobbes?

I loved that strip!!
<--- see my avatar

[beam me up scottie]

39. Thank you for those.

There was another one I remember about bridges, wish I could find it.

I miss Calvin.

[progressoid]

40. Matthew 7:7 - Ask and it will be given to you

[beam me up scottie]

41. LMAO!

That's the one! I also loved the gruesome snowmen he built, especially the house of horror, lol!

I adored that strip, a pity it ended too soon. I wonder what Calvin is like as a grown up.

Thanks for the laughs!