Gender Neutral Parenting: 5 Ways To Avoid Implicit Sexism

[redqueen]

...

In one experiment, mothers were asked to guess the steepness of a carpeted slope that their 11-month olds would be able to crawl. Then the children actually crawled the slope, and the difference between actual and mother-predicted angles was noted.

The results showed that both boys and girls were able to crawl the same degree of incline. However, the predictions of the mothers were correct within one degree for the boys and underestimated their daughter’s ability by nine degrees.

What this shows is that the presumption that boys are more physical causes parents to encourage their boys more in physical activities while cautioning their girls. This further translates into providing more opportunities for boys to be physical and fewer for girls.
The result?

Boys actually do develop stronger physical skills than girls. But not because of anything innate or biological, but rather because of the gender roles that the parents subconsciously projected onto their babies.

...

http://everydayfeminism.com/2013/11/gnp-avoid-implicit-sexism/

[seabeyond]

1. right on. and i KNOW this to be a truth, because i personally lived it and raised boys with it.

gender neutral parenting.... the BEST. my kids excelled at speech, reading, communications, recognizing feeling cause i called bullshit to preconceived ideas and conditioning. that being said. i will read the article now. love this shit. and thanks redq. will get back to more discussion a little later.

yea

perfect.

[redqueen]

2. That book should be required reading for every expectant mother.

As it says in the article, people simply aren't aware they're biased. They assume it's those other, bad people who are biased.

[seabeyond]

3. while i remember to say this, i will tell you something else. cuddling our babies.

i read a handful of years ago a study where it showed that a mother held her son less than her girls. not that anything was done purposely. it was our conditioned preconceived ideas about genders. i was literally appalled. having just naturally gone with parenting of seeing my babies as human, not gender, i held them lots. and lots and lots. i love holding them. so much my youngest REFUSED to get off my hip until 14 and half months, lol. (he is a different child in his own unique ways). my oldest i held to sleep. people telling me wrong. me telling them cant let him cry to sleep. my mom telling me wrong. at 4 mo i told her... then let him cry to sleep. you do it. cause i am not. 20 minutes later, baby in arms, she says... do it your way. lol.

i held, cuddled, loved on as a baby. not as a gender.

then i read the study. that is the difference. we do things that are pushing little boys away before their time. it is not wimping our little boys. they are, as girls, innately independent and given the security adn love and trust, they will let us know, each stage of the way, when they.... THEY are ready to step away to the next stage. we do not have to decide for them. given a secure and safe environment they do, and we follow along.

now... back to reading, lol

[ismnotwasm]

4. I see this all the time

Young mothers insisting their little boys are more aggressive " I never believed it until I had one" I point out from birth gender indoctrination, the heteronormative standard of it, and they 'get' it, without quite believing it.

[seabeyond]

5. and my boys were and are not. amazing that. nt