History of Feminism
Related: About this forumA Call to Men
A Call to Men with Tony Porter1
I grew up in New York City, between Harlem and the Bronx. Growing up as a boy, we were taught that men had to be tough, had to be strong, had to be courageous, dominating -- no pain, no emotions, with the exception of anger -- and definitely no fear; that men are in charge, which means women are not; that men lead, and you should just follow and do what we say; that men are superior; women are inferior; that men are strong; women are weak; that women are of less value, property of men, and objects, particularly sexual objects.
I've later come to know that to be the collective socialization of men, better known as the "man box." See this man box has in it all the ingredients of how we define what it means to be a man. Now I also want to say, without a doubt, there are some wonderful, wonderful, absolutely wonderful things about being a man.
But at the same time, there's some stuff that's just straight up twisted, and we really need to begin to challenge, look at it and really get in the process of deconstructing,
redefining, what we come to know as manhood.
This is my two at home, Kendall and Jay. They're 11 and 12. Kendall's 15 months older than Jay. There was a period of time when my wife -- her name is Tammie -- and I, we just got real busy and whip, bam, boom: Kendall and Jay.
http://everydayfeminism.com/wp-content/uploads/2014/01/EF-Transcription-A-Call-To-Men-.pdf
redqueen
(115,172 posts)That reminds me of a part of this interview with Robert Jensen (which is very much worth watching):
He asks what are the good things "about being a man" that are distinctly masculine traits?
The gender nonsense really needs to stop. He calls it an obsession with what's defined as masculine - and discusses how being obsessed with defining 'masculinity', as long as it's done within a patriarchal system, is only going to lead to a deepening of patriarchy. I agree so very strongly.
(Another apt part of this video is at around 14:30.)
ismnotwasm
(42,478 posts)One of the comics I'm reading the character -- who is very "masculine" keeps getting his shit challenged by his girlfriend and keeps making the same mistakes, so slow to learn, but learn he does.
redqueen
(115,172 posts)We need millions more like him. With time and lots of education, we'll get them.
Warpy
(113,131 posts)One of the reasons the violent, anti woman pornography (and I'd put the "stupid cow" paradigm into the overall predatory male pornography) is so popular is that it's one of the few places men can live up to that macho stereotype of the dominant, lone male controlling everything and everyone around him. Real life is too messy for that and there's no way to live up to any of those male stereotypes. Men are going to get very threatened when this junk is threatened.
Videos like this one might cause the more astute of them to start questioning what they're seeing and once the questioning starts, the stereotype doesn't have a chance.
redqueen
(115,172 posts)I look forward to a day when the insights he shares here are common knowledge, at least among progressives.
geek tragedy
(68,868 posts)he's good people.