Awesome Woman Scares Groper So Badly He Craps His Pants

[ismnotwasm]

Today's heart(and pants)warming story of sweet payback for someone who really had it coming is brought to you by The Muppet Movie, the internet, and one petite but brave Boston lady who likes to practice making scary monster voices in her spare time.

Reddit user ManichestBreastiny (+10) shared her story with TwoXChromosomes, the site's female-focused subforum. MB was leaving a movie theater in Boston and walking the short distance to the nearest T station when,

A man that looked to be at least fifteen years older than myself who was walking near me in the same direction took an extra step to catch up to me and put his arm around my shoulder and grabbed my breast, and said "Hey".
Oh, hell no. MB wasn't having any of it, and rather than just taking it, she fought back in an unconventional way. She explains,

I pushed him off me, and in my most threatening bellow yelled, "HOW DARE YOU TOUCH ME?"
Now, before you shrug and say who cares? I yell at street gropers and harassers all the time! there's something you should know about MB. MB likes to practice funny voices, like, as a hobby. One of those funny voices is a scary demon voice. And so when she yelled "HOW DARE YOU TOUCH ME!?" what her attacker heard was this:


http://jezebel.com/awesome-woman-scares-groper-so-badly-he-craps-his-pants-1586151686

[sufrommich]

1. That.....was awesome!

I want the ability to do that voice.

[ismnotwasm]

2. ...

Me too!

[mopinko]

3. ok, who is practicing that voice right now?

i know i am.
bwahahaha

[sufrommich]

4. Lol,I tried it and now my throat hurts.

My sister can do an awesome super low Darth Vader type voice though,I guess it's all in the superior vocal chord gene.

[sheshe2]

5. Brava MB!

I need that voice too!

[theHandpuppet]

7. That's the kind of key fob we need

Forget the mini-flashlight, I want one that has that voice recording!

[liberalhistorian]

14. You know, I sense a prime

business opportunity there! I know I sure would pay to have something like that.

[lark]

17. You sell it

I'll buy one for me and a bunch of other women as well.
Awesome!

[sheshe2]

16. Excellent idea!

[theHandpuppet]

6. OMFG!!!

You just made my day!

[Blue Owl]

8. That move should be called a "Ted Nugent"

[smallcat88]

9. That was awesome!

I can do funny voices too. The key for those trying to practice doing a voice like that is to make sounds come from different areas of the larynx. It's also the difference between accents. British, for example, tend to speak from the center of their mouth.

Try speaking from as deep in your throat as you can but with a squeaky voice. Deep voice works too, depends on your voice and vocal chords.

[klook]

10. Outstanding

"ManichestBreastiny" - LOL!

That voice! Reminds me of the Exorcist. Yow.

[FailureToCommunicate]

11. Brilliant! Fast thinking too.

If only life could be like the movies, and have that end with her handcuffing the creep to something, like a bike rake, for the cops to find (As in "The Fugitive&quot

[Orrex]

12. MISANDRY!

[Demoiselle]

13. I shouted/smacked a groper off a NYC subway car once...

Long time ago. I was getting on a train in midtown at rush hour, and behind me, pushing much more closely than necessary, even with the crowd, was a creepy type. I calmly took my (sro) place in the car, took hold of one of the hanging straps with my right hand, turned smoothly to my left and smacked the bastard across the face. Really hard. Hard and loud enough to make a woman at the end of the car let out a startled gasp. As I did that, I yelled in my best New Yorker Second Balcony voice, KEEP YA HANDS TO YOURSELF!
The car door was still open and he bolted back onto the platform.
There was not a scintilla of reaction in the car. Nobody looked me in the eye. No thumbs up, no nods, no "Goodonyer" smiles.
Nothing. Much as I would have liked a little friendly acknowledgement, I guess they might have all been afraid I'd come after them next.

[Leith]

15. Good For You!

And good for the woman in the article.

What kind of civilized person thinks he (or she) has carte blanch to grab another person's body? I feel like I'm violating a pregnant woman's person when she invites me to feel her baby kick.

[nomorenomore08]

19. +2

[IronLionZion]

21. I've wondered if women would want friendly acknowledgement

I see that sort of thing on the DC metro sometimes and I just try not to look at angry screaming people because I don't want them coming after me in case they were looking to punish someone else.

Glad it worked out for you.

[Squinch]

18. That is fabulous. I hope this story goes far, and a lot more men run into demons where they least

expect them!

I'm going to practice that voice.

[BrotherIvan]

20. MB is a godess!

I've been chuckling about this for hours!

[freshwest]

22. Trying to embed that sound:

http://vocaroo.com/i/s0LO2ZylAaYG

Clicking plays the sound immediately.