Arguing on DU may not change minds, but it may be good for your state of mind
... new study from the University at Buffalo that assessed bodily responses suggests that standing up for your beliefs, expressing your opinions and demonstrating your core values can be a positive psychological experience. There can be a clear divergence between what people do and say and how they feel, according to Mark Seery, an associate professor in UB's Department of Psychology.
"People can show conformity, but going along with the group doesn't mean they're going along happily," he says. "The external behavior isn't necessarily a good indication of their internal experience."
The findings, published in the journal Psychophysiology, provide new insights into what it's like being alone against the group, investigating the experience as it happens.
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https://www.sciencedaily.com/releases/2016/08/160819162352.htm
elleng
(137,592 posts)I do feel better after I've stated my opinions, but then, after I receive what I consider 'bullying' responses, the 'positive' experience changes; I'm not referring to mere differences of opinion.
hunter
(39,177 posts)Just like "real life" I'm generally clueless if somebody loves me or hates me until they kiss me or punch me in the face.
But I do worry sometimes that I might be a bully myself. I've got some very strong opinions about a few things.
Strong opinions do not make bullies. Bullies treat other people badly.
hunter
(39,177 posts)... I was bullied and beaten mercilessly in middle and high school. I quit high school for college. The physical abuse ended, but my cluelessness did not. I was "asked" to leave college twice (under threat of permanent expulsion) so it took me nine years to graduate.
So maybe not "lucky," just different.
My recent stay in the psych ward, locked up under 24 hour a day supervision (you can't even go to the bathroom for more than five minutes that someone's not knocking on the door asking if you're okay, and there are cameras in your room...) didn't really increase my self-confidence, but I did learn some new tools for dealing with my madness and I was prescribed some new meds that seem to be working.
I dunno why we so often think it's somehow our fault when we are bullied, but we do. I remember teachers telling me to "be a man" even as I was bleeding, as if that would solve the problem. They ought to have been doing something about the bullying.
Amazingly foolish, of teachers.
Good the new meds are working.
HereSince1628
(36,063 posts)I assumed it meant beat up on someone smaller, which my younger brothers were...