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IngridsLittleAngel

(1,962 posts)

168. There is only one "choice" when it comes to this..

Reply to obamanut2012 (Reply #88)

Mon Jun 20, 2022, 05:10 PM

Jun 2022

We either choose to be someone we're not, which leads to a life of pain and misery and self-loathing, often leaving real scars... Or we choose to be who we are inside and give it our best shot to live a happy and healthy life.

Trans women don't wake up one day and see "Gee, wouldn't it be fun to be a woman today?" We realize we are women and accept who we really are and work to live as ourselves.

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We have made an adjustment to DU's "No bigotry/insensitivity" rule: please read [View all] EarlG Jun 2022 OP

Ty, EarlG! SheltieLover Jun 2022 #1

Thank you to you both, IngridsLittleAngel and EarlG. Solly Mack Jun 2022 #2

Thank you. It is distressing when people thoughtlessly hurt other people's feelings Walleye Jun 2022 #3

Cudn't agree more;precisely why bigots like JKRowling & other fascists should be promptly cancelled! InAbLuEsTaTe Jun 2022 #240

Good. Behind the Aegis Jun 2022 #4

this right here!!!!! mopinko Jun 2022 #26

I agree! I wish we could have Cha Jun 2022 #42

I would like that too, but would settle for just the "bigotry" rule because it is complicated. Behind the Aegis Jun 2022 #57

Yes! Solly Mack Jun 2022 #101

I could not agree more. The comments from the alerter gave some context that is so often hlthe2b Jun 2022 #200

100% agree. soldierant Jun 2022 #202

Very true! Eom Karma13612 Jun 2022 #280

While we're discussing DU juries, I'd like to know how any juror can possibility judge, Dark n Stormy Knight Jun 2022 #248

Yes. That is generally a "crystal ball" issue. There are undoubtedly some alerters with a "pattern," hlthe2b Jun 2022 #269

And even if the alerters have a pattern, like alerting on every issue they see ... marble falls Jun 2023 #323

I agree, Karma13612 Jun 2022 #281

actually that is not true for real juries Kali Jun 2022 #290

Are those witnesses and evidence somehow Karma13612 Jun 2022 #315

Personally, I would like the jury system here to be abolished. MarcA Jun 2022 #313

You can go to the original OP and look ... marble falls Jun 2023 #324

+1000 n/t FreeState Jun 2022 #292

Thank you EarlG for the information and education. Irish_Dem Jun 2022 #5

Good on ya' EarlG! AndyS Jun 2022 #6

Kudos to IngridsLittleAngel. Irish_Dem Jun 2022 #7

We had a transgender human come out in a group setting. It wasn't easy for this person. LakeArenal Jun 2022 #8

Duly noted... and thanks. AmBlue Jun 2022 #9

Thank you for this clarification, my dear EarlG. CaliforniaPeggy Jun 2022 #10

This YoshidaYui Jun 2022 #12

Progress, not perfection. joshdawg Jun 2022 #87

Working for sure. notinkansas Jun 2022 #252

Thank you, EarlG! Aristus Jun 2022 #11

I think this is a good idea. phylny Jun 2022 #13

nobody is out there persecuting xtians. mopinko Jun 2022 #27

Indeed. Excellent point, mopinko. Sad but true. calimary Jun 2022 #55

Nobody? ruet Jun 2022 #72

fine. nobody here. in this country or on this board. mopinko Jun 2022 #76

Context SpankMe Jun 2022 #246

Using the term "sky-daddy" refers to all religions, deists, all people that believe in God. Dysfunctional Jun 2022 #113

I agree. Maraya1969 Jun 2022 #137

People that believe in a paternalistic monotheism. maxsolomon Jun 2022 #156

"persecuting" & "insulting" are both supposed to be frowned upon oldsoftie Jun 2022 #176

THANK you.. whathehell Apr 2023 #320

Christians aren't a persecuted minority Kali Jun 2022 #36

But... lees1975 Jun 2022 #50

Agree. EVERY INDIVIDUAL should be protected from bigotry/insensitivity. Hortensis Jun 2022 #94

Well said and that is my point, but you phylny Jun 2022 #126

As usual, you say it better than anyone can. Eliot Rosewater Jun 2022 #227

Lol. Thanks, but think I imprinted Jane Austin as a kid. Hortensis Jun 2022 #272

when individual Christian democrats are personally attacked I will be sure to alert on the post. Kali Jun 2022 #206

Thank you! Hassin Bin Sober Jun 2022 #293

I Think That... ruet Jun 2022 #51

I think that I don't vote with my phylny Jun 2022 #117

The no bigoted/insensitivity rule posted specifically mentions religion MichMan Jun 2022 #53

My point and thank you. phylny Jun 2022 #120

God, do you not get why posting this here is a bad idea? obamanut2012 Jun 2022 #52

Post removed Post removed Jun 2022 #58

This message was self-deleted by its author ruet Jun 2022 #64

Pathetic prejudice going on here.... nt LAS14 Jun 2022 #90

Seems pretty clear to me what the revised rules states MichMan Jun 2022 #62

I feel I must ask how this works when the religious belief of Republicans NullTuples Jun 2022 #224

Yup. Thanks for this. nt LAS14 Jun 2022 #84

I don't accommodate this anymore. Duncan Grant Jun 2022 #106

Whether you accommodate this or not doesn't phylny Jun 2022 #124

Start a separate thread in GD, please. Duncan Grant Jun 2022 #128

It's not about "me." phylny Jun 2022 #129

There's a time to step up and a time to step back. Duncan Grant Jun 2022 #130

Next time I need advice on posting here phylny Jun 2022 #131

I have temporarily blocked you from posting in this forum EarlG Jun 2022 #135

Attacking ideas is not attacking the person who Voltaire2 Jun 2022 #143

Do you often ask "Don't all lives matter?" yardwork Jun 2022 #181

Thanks for this Sunsky Jun 2022 #188

That's different. fescuerescue Jun 2022 #199

Excellent. MontanaMama Jun 2022 #14

Right there with you!! InAbLuEsTaTe Jun 2022 #237

Thank you. irisblue Jun 2022 #15

Thank you. momta Jun 2022 #16

Kickin' Faux pas Jun 2022 #17

They've been doing a good job of moderating, but it's likely been a lot of extra work NullTuples Jun 2022 #149

There are no moderators on DU. There is a jury system. We are all moderators. yardwork Jun 2022 #183

It would help if jurors were told the outcome on the cases they're called to judge. TheRickles Jun 2022 #185

I agree with your point. There is no feedback. How am I doing as a juror? 70sEraVet Jun 2022 #209

+100000000 Karma13612 Jun 2022 #282

Yes, but entire discussions have been taken down. I assumed that was not due to a jurist NullTuples Jun 2022 #226

You're right, that would be volunteer Hosts. yardwork Jun 2022 #274

If an OP itself is taken down, the rest of the discussion stays up, but is locked. Makes sense to me marble falls Jun 2023 #322

Keep an eye out whenever there is any news blurb Ms. Toad Jun 2022 #175

Not only that vercetti2021 Jun 2022 #228

Correct IngridsLittleAngel Jun 2022 #231

Yep vercetti2021 Jun 2022 #233

I'm already anticipating that possibility IngridsLittleAngel Jun 2022 #256

Wow! Faux pas Jun 2022 #278

TY for this bluestarone Jun 2022 #18

I am very happy to see this. MuseRider Jun 2022 #19

Thank you! GoneOffShore Jun 2022 #20

Solidly progressive. Torchlight Jun 2022 #21

Good! BumRushDaShow Jun 2022 #22

Best of luck with this. William769 Jun 2022 #23

What's deadnaming? wryter2000 Jun 2022 #24

Definition billh58 Jun 2022 #78

Thanks wryter2000 Jun 2022 #102

Here's some information about deadnaming: EarlG Jun 2022 #80

I assume it's using the name the person was given originally but no longer uses Ocelot II Jun 2022 #82

Thanks for this, EarlG. greatauntoftriplets Jun 2022 #25

Let's hope so! William769 Jun 2022 #33

We've been working on him (my brother-in-law) greatauntoftriplets Jun 2022 #56

I know a good few like that. And thats why he lost. oldsoftie Jun 2022 #173

It took some convincing because he's always voted for president. greatauntoftriplets Jun 2022 #186

To win you HAVE to keep your original voters. he started bleeding them. oldsoftie Jun 2022 #191

I am unclear on what this means... LiberatedUSA Jun 2022 #28

What if the unsensitive comment is made by a Democratic public figure? MichMan Jun 2022 #38

It's really just a common sense reminder EarlG Jun 2022 #75

Some of us jurors do not understand what's wrong with the post complained of. Shrike47 Jun 2022 #29

This is good to know, thank you! arthritisR_US Jun 2022 #30

Thank You so much EarlG.... Tikki Jun 2022 #31

K&R spanone Jun 2022 #32

Forgive my ignorance please, but what is "deadnaming"? nolabear Jun 2022 #34

I didn't know either... Moosepoop Jun 2022 #40

Thanks! nolabear Jun 2022 #70

"Deadnaming" is using a trans person's name prior to transition. Behind the Aegis Jun 2022 #41

Thanks. I kind of figured. nolabear Jun 2022 #71

That's when you call Caitlyn Jenner by her former name instead of her current one. LonePirate Jun 2022 #47

Gotcha. Thanks. Makes sense. nolabear Jun 2022 #74

Thank you, EarlG. This place is an ongoing education Hekate Jun 2022 #35

One of the biggest plusses on DUs side is its embrace of diversity. lpbk2713 Jun 2022 #37

Thank you, EarlG!!! Maeve Jun 2022 #39

Thank you!!!! Scottie Mom Jun 2022 #43

Maybe you could get EndlessWire Jun 2022 #44

are you serious? Kali Jun 2022 #207

Oh boy obamanut2012 Jun 2022 #265

Thank You, EarlG & IngridsLittleAngel! Cha Jun 2022 #45

It would be nice if those of us who had posts hidden for calling out transphobia obamanut2012 Jun 2022 #46

+ 1000 I hope earlg will take note of this. Ms. Toad Jun 2022 #178

I've had similar experiences AZSkiffyGeek Jun 2022 #198

I'm usually firm, but civil - Ms. Toad Jun 2022 #201

Thank you Earl G. and IngridsLittleAngel. Moosepoop Jun 2022 #48

Bravo EG! 👍🏻 Floyd R. Turbo Jun 2022 #49

Thank you. This shit has been driving me up a wall lately. Hassin Bin Sober Jun 2022 #54

❤ littlemissmartypants Jun 2022 #59

big+ llashram Jun 2022 #60

This message was self-deleted by its author 867-5309. Jun 2022 #61

What does that have to do with the OP? obamanut2012 Jun 2022 #67

This message was self-deleted by its author 867-5309. Jun 2022 #79

Oh, I see -- you are pushing obamanut2012 Jun 2022 #83

I'm wondering about Hillary Clinton's recent statement that she thought, pnwmom Jun 2022 #63

What if a similar comment is posted & someone is critical of it being said?? MichMan Jun 2022 #91

I'm avoiding commenting, too much stuff I have to look up like Captain Zero Jun 2022 #261

The rule does not appear to preclude this. Jirel Jun 2022 #112

I'm going to ask a genuine question IngridsLittleAngel Jun 2022 #158

I don't think anybody said Hillary's carry more weight. Lots of posts here get ignored, pnwmom Jun 2022 #218

I'll just leave it at this: IngridsLittleAngel Jun 2022 #221

Last Wednesday FreepFryer Jun 2022 #230

And I'll add to that: President Biden on March 30, 2022 (Transgender Day of Visibility): IngridsLittleAngel Jun 2022 #232

I admit to having problems with the "they/them" pronouns. LonePirate Jun 2022 #65

Actually, from a grammar standpoint, single but indeterminate individuals are also "they." TygrBright Jun 2022 #96

Ill bet you use a singular they more often than you think. Chellee Jun 2022 #147

A bit of context: NullTuples Jun 2022 #160

ME TOOOOO!!!! Trueblue Texan Jun 2022 #192

Omg why do you keep posting this? obamanut2012 Jun 2022 #267

Second-hand pronouns Tree-Hugger Jun 2022 #305

Singular they has been used as centuries obamanut2012 Jun 2022 #266

I really like They/Them DBoon Jun 2022 #312

thank ya's ! freedom mean's " all people - not just a few " ! cloudboy07 Jun 2022 #66

Post removed Post removed Jun 2022 #68

Do you not get that this post breaks the new rule? obamanut2012 Jun 2022 #81

I told you I'm in trouble now. n/t SleeplessinSoCal Jun 2022 #86

Wow, you are really proud of this obamanut2012 Jun 2022 #89

Works for me... 2naSalit Jun 2022 #69

Earl, are you one of the people ... Jeebo Jun 2022 #73

Some info on juries Yonnie3 Jun 2022 #95

Personal opinions will always enter into the equation EarlG Jun 2022 #99

What is the recourse, then, for those battered by transphobic or homophobic posts left standing? Ms. Toad Jun 2022 #184

+1000 Karma13612 Jun 2022 #283

Post removed Post removed Jun 2022 #77

"life choices" -- what about being trans is a life choice? obamanut2012 Jun 2022 #88

Yeah, referring to an element of someone's identity as a "life choice" could be offensive. TygrBright Jun 2022 #100

That is so fcuking annoying I can't even Jilly_in_VA Jun 2022 #165

I know, I know, Jilly... TygrBright Jun 2022 #170

There is only one "choice" when it comes to this.. IngridsLittleAngel Jun 2022 #168

I commend you for this service to DU and you have my full support!! InAbLuEsTaTe Jun 2022 #235

This is a step in the right direction but may not be enough. yardwork Jun 2022 #85

Good things happen. Duncan Grant Jun 2022 #92

LOUD APPLAUSE!!!! n/t TygrBright Jun 2022 #93

Good idea. FoxNewsSucks Jun 2022 #97

Sometimes we are in need of enlightenment, or at least reminders. Ocelot II Jun 2022 #98

Having read this thread, I see I'm not the only person that didn't know what deadnaming is... Takket Jun 2022 #103

Even if we didn't know the term wryter2000 Jun 2022 #109

This. Exactly this. IngridsLittleAngel Jun 2022 #210

Such an excellent point, one that even conservatives with names like, NullTuples Jun 2022 #245

I did wonder EarlG Jun 2022 #115

I would suggest putting it in the context of how journalists are expected to handle it: AP Stylebook hlthe2b Jun 2022 #190

Excellent. vanlassie Jun 2022 #104

Thank you. scarletlib Jun 2022 #105

Thank you vercetti2021 Jun 2022 #107

I also strongly support this new rule/clarification of existing rules LetMyPeopleVote Jun 2022 #108

Thank you. I alerted on a post that was clearly anti-Trans...and it was not hidden...I get that some Demsrule86 Jun 2022 #110

In this thread? Same obamanut2012 Jun 2022 #116

Which post? EarlG Jun 2022 #139

Oops i didn't refresh the thread obamanut2012 Jun 2022 #153

Sadly that's pretty common AZSkiffyGeek Jun 2022 #140

Post removed Post removed Jun 2022 #169

Amen! Jack-o-Lantern Jun 2022 #111

Post removed Post removed Jun 2022 #114

Oh brother obamanut2012 Jun 2022 #119

FYI: Posting privileges revoked Behind the Aegis Jun 2022 #125

Member for 10.5 years dpibel Jun 2022 #132

never a good idea to show your ass in the owners thread. mopinko Jun 2022 #148

Words of wisdom n/t Yonnie3 Jun 2022 #159

You have no idea how hormones work do you? vercetti2021 Jun 2022 #123

Thank you for updating the No bigotry/insensitivity" rule with the help of IngridsLittleAngel yaesu Jun 2022 #118

When someone tells me their name, that name is what I call that person. MineralMan Jun 2022 #121

Well, but what if you keep having to repeat the name, Trueblue Texan Jun 2022 #189

I ask, if there's any question. When talking to that person, though, MineralMan Jun 2022 #205

Recommend. sheshe2 Jun 2022 #122

Can I still be mean to TFG and Mrs. TFG? COL Mustard Jun 2022 #127

Thank you! Thank you! Thank you!! rainin Jun 2022 #133

TY! Lithos Jun 2022 #134

Thank you for this very helpful spotlight mahina Jun 2022 #136

Thank you, EarlG wendyb-NC Jun 2022 #138

I appreciate the rule clarification hueymahl Jun 2022 #141

Thank you. Voltaire2 Jun 2022 #142

well done jcgoldie Jun 2022 #144

TY, being extra careful here. Magoo48 Jun 2022 #145

I have a transgender grandson Frances Jun 2022 #146

Thank you, EarlG! crickets Jun 2022 #150

Thank you EarlG and IngridsLittleAngel. Well done. c-rational Jun 2022 #151

Thank you! n/t KatK Jun 2022 #152

This message was self-deleted by its author CurtEastPoint Jun 2022 #154

You're welcome everyone and thank you EarlG IngridsLittleAngel Jun 2022 #155

Thank you for stepping up, Tarc Jun 2022 #171

Left or right, blue or red, all we can do in life is learn and grow IngridsLittleAngel Jun 2022 #215

K&R. +1000. KY_EnviroGuy Jun 2022 #174

You're welcome IngridsLittleAngel Jun 2022 #216

So sorry to hear about this problem. Callalily Jun 2022 #157

Sounds good. Martin68 Jun 2022 #161

From a trans woman & parent of a trans teen...thank you so much for this. NullTuples Jun 2022 #162

Sorry I was recently asked to be on a jury.I did not understand the rd2 and star wars If there was r Oppaloopa Jun 2022 #163

K&R uppityperson Jun 2022 #164

thank you so much! Javaman Jun 2022 #166

this is why I keep donating to DU Skittles Jun 2022 #167

Thank you, Ms. Toad Jun 2022 #172

Thank you EarlG and IngridsLittleAngel. Very nicely handled! Totally Tunsie Jun 2022 #177

Reaffirms my fragile membership in the PTL Club. KY_EnviroGuy Jun 2022 #179

Thank you. This has been a long time coming. Autumn Jun 2022 #180

Thanks for the clarity... Trueblue Texan Jun 2022 #182

Ask them how they want to be called AZSkiffyGeek Jun 2022 #203

I don't have a problem when I'm directly addressing them. Trueblue Texan Jun 2022 #234

Not really AZSkiffyGeek Jun 2022 #241

No problem Tree-Hugger Jun 2022 #297

No, unless you can show me where trans folks aren't allowed have grammar rules applied to them obamanut2012 Jun 2022 #309

I know some situations can be confusing. Best advice? Ask them IngridsLittleAngel Jun 2022 #213

This is not my problem. Trueblue Texan Jun 2022 #236

I've probably forgotten half of my grammar over the decades IngridsLittleAngel Jun 2022 #255

It is are, not is obamanut2012 Jun 2022 #262

OK, that Karma13612 Jun 2022 #284

It is are, not is obamanut2012 Jun 2022 #263

they are bringing over the photo album Kali Jun 2022 #217

Ok. Let me explain it another way. Trueblue Texan Jun 2022 #238

You are elevating "rules" over people. Ms. Toad Jun 2022 #244

Do not project your own biases onto others. Trueblue Texan Jun 2022 #268

Perhaps you don't have the life experience to understand how your comments came across. Ms. Toad Jun 2022 #275

+1 obamanut2012 Jun 2022 #306

'Less offensive manner" Tree-Hugger Jun 2022 #299

... Kali Jun 2022 #247

Passive voice, sentence 1. Trueblue Texan Jun 2022 #270

Just stop it obamanut2012 Jun 2022 #307

Why do you keep using improper grammar when talking about this? obamanut2012 Jun 2022 #264

Well it's because I don't know the correct grammar! Trueblue Texan Jun 2022 #271

You literally know the correct grammar already obamanut2012 Jun 2022 #273

Jesus. Trueblue Texan Jun 2022 #277

But you do understand the grammar re: they obamanut2012 Jun 2022 #291

Textbook microagression and sealioning nt AZSkiffyGeek Jun 2022 #295

+++ quaint Jun 2022 #302

I suppose it's nice to have a perfect example in the thread about what not to do AZSkiffyGeek Jun 2022 #303

I really hope EarlG sees this thread obamanut2012 Jun 2022 #304

But...but... Tree-Hugger Jun 2022 #311

I'll try to answer this fairly... IngridsLittleAngel Jun 2022 #308

I sincerely appreciate this explanation. Trueblue Texan Jun 2022 #316

You're welcome IngridsLittleAngel Jun 2022 #317

3. Jerry wrapped their hands around the coffee cup. (Maybe?) eom Karma13612 Jun 2022 #285

A hypothetical. Saviolo Jun 2022 #289

"Transgendered" Tree-Hugger Jun 2022 #296

Thank you for this obamanut2012 Jun 2022 #298

No problem Tree-Hugger Jun 2022 #300

I agree obamanut2012 Jun 2022 #310

Awesome! ArizonaLib Jun 2022 #187

K&R ! stonecutter357 Jun 2022 #193

Thank you, EarlG Alice Kramden Jun 2022 #194

Acknowledged. Good idea. PatrickforB Jun 2022 #195

Bravo HAB911 Jun 2022 #196

Post removed Post removed Jun 2022 #197

WayTaGo DU, WayTaGo Admins! Stinky The Clown Jun 2022 #204

Thank you. AverageOldGuy Jun 2022 #208

Post removed Post removed Jun 2022 #211

Thanks. Great idea FloridaBlues Jun 2022 #212

This is wonderful! AwakeAtLast Jun 2022 #214

This is great, and it will make DU even stronger. Politicub Jun 2022 #219

thank you for this gopiscrap Jun 2022 #220

K&R !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! n/t RKP5637 Jun 2022 #222

Thankyou!!! marble falls Jun 2022 #223

This is a good change. PTWB Jun 2022 #225

You know who doesnt have this problem? Eliot Rosewater Jun 2022 #229

Last, but not least..... BidenRocks Jun 2022 #239

You rock. Keep up the good work, n/t. Scruffy1 Jun 2022 #242

Thank you! Mad_Machine76 Jun 2022 #243

❤️ ✿❧🌿❧✿ ❤️ Lucinda Jun 2022 #249

EarlG.... Upthevibe Jun 2022 #250

100% agree!!! I myself have been attacked here on DU, for different reasons... CaptainTruth Jun 2022 #251

Thank you. TDale313 Jun 2022 #253

K&R ismnotwasm Jun 2022 #254

Thank you, and I apologize for any insensitivity MyMission Jun 2022 #257

Thank you so very much! LostOne4Ever Jun 2022 #258

Yes! Yes! Yes! Lunabell Jun 2022 #259

Everybody deserves respect. Aussie105 Jun 2022 #260

Thank You! MindHowYouGo Jun 2022 #276

Makes sense! Karma13612 Jun 2022 #287

I greatly appreciate this, EarlG Metatron Jun 2022 #279

Thank you. You expressed this far more tactfully, and graciously, Roisin Ni Fiachra Jun 2022 #286

Thank you both for taking the time and care to educate us all on this important issue RainCaster Jun 2022 #288

Thank you! FreeState Jun 2022 #294

Thank you Tree-Hugger Jun 2022 #301

One reason why DU is my favorite place to post ificandream Jun 2022 #314

A day (or 3 ) late, and a dollar short- Karma13612 Jun 2022 #318

Thank you, EarlG wendyb-NC Jun 2022 #319

Thnkyou, thankyou, thankyou. marble falls Jun 2023 #321

Good move. Thanks riversedge Jun 2023 #325