Feminists
In reply to the discussion: 2nd and 3rd wave feminism [View all]stevenleser
(32,886 posts)I guess what also disappointed me and disappoints me about second wavers is that they seem to discount the idea that people find each other sexually attractive and like to look at each other.
Heterosexual men like to look at women in various stages of dress or undress. Gay men like to look at men in various stages of dress or undress. Gay women like to look at women in various stages of dress or undress. Straight women like to look at men in various stages of dress or undress. Bisexual men and women like to look at women and men in various stages of dress or undress.
There is nothing wrong with any of that.
It doesn't somehow become wrong in 1/5 of those instances and not the others. Nothing will allow me to buy that.
We were talking about my daughter earlier. When I go with her and her friends to the beach, you better believe they are scoping out guys they think are cute in their bathing suits. Tell me, should I yell at her for that? Are you going to tell me I should lecture her about dehumanizing the guys? I'm not going to do any of that.
What we are talking about is not dehumanizing, it's human. Look, I get it. My ex wife wanted my daughter to be in pageants and she wanted her to be a cheerleader and I fought both of those things, hard. (after we divorced my ex married a conservative guy and became a Republican. Go fig). I am not in favor of anyone participating in a pageant. I think that pageants superficially emphasize looks over substance. My daughter reflects exactly what I want for all women, she is brilliant, strong, aggressive, fearless and a force to be reckoned with and I believe she will achieve her goal of becoming a doctor. But I also recognize that what I want doesnt necessarily mean all women want that for themselves.
If a woman like the gay woman in the pageant wants to do that, if she wants to be judged on her looks, should I get upset about that? Should anyone else? Using my above example and point, should I get upset if a man wants to be judged on his looks? How about if a man wants to exhibit himself to other men or a woman wants to exhibit herself to other women? How about a bisexual man or woman who wants to exhibit themselves to both sexes.
Second wave thinking does not work when you consider those examples. It's why I became a third waver. Your body is your body. My body is my body. We both have the right to do pretty much what we want with them and express ourselves sexually in a way that we want (assuming any participants/recipients or viewers are concenting adults) gender bias does not enter into that equation.