A mix of depression, family obligations, and a touch of anxiety and depression. Ok, a lot more than a touch, it has been rough. No DU secret, I have C-PTSD, see a therapist and a psychiatrist, both help a lot. I have really been struggling lately, I have even skipped some workouts at the gym, I just needed to be alone, so I substituted some middle of the night bike rides to think under the stars in the quiet of the darkness in the peaceful 'burbs.
I actually have relied on my one PT a lot, he has "been there" with family and friends, totally supports me and has become a true friend. We made a deal last night, my idea. If I don't straighten up my act in no more than a couple of weeks, we're going to put on the boxing gloves, go outside behind the gym, and he's going to go a few rounds with me and beat the shit out of me. 
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