This may be it

[TigressDem]

83. You need a better publicist. (wink)

So if YOU are the only one calling yourself a failure. STOP IT.

A lawyer should not be their own defendant and a person shouldn't be their own judge, jury and executioner squad. STOP.

A doctor shouldn't operate on themselves. So STOP tearing yourself apart.

You are a nice person to others, so treat yourself with the same respect.

Don't ASSUME those people ran in fear or revulsion from you. EVEN if they did, it's THEIR stupidity, not yours. A lot of people are small minded and don't choose to get their head our of their rears long enough to remedy the situation.

Don't BE that person. Don't be intimated by those people. With their head in said position, you can definitely out run them if needed.

How big is your dog? Even if he is the nicest pooch in the world if he was drooling those ladies might have thought their dogs looked like appetizers and just didn't want to risk it.

My son had a bully breed, stratfroshire I think it was called, basically taller and leaner than most pits but still with the big old mug grin. He was trained to be a family pet. Kids could put their hands in the dog's food bowl. He would bark or growl but not anything more. When the oldest kid was 2 years old he smacked the dog right on the nut sack. Dog turned around planted the vulnerable spot on the floor and behaved like a gentleman.

Still he was strong. Pulled a car over ice in the winter. About 10 feet, but still. I was taking him home after Christmas to Iron Range and we stopped at the last rest stop in Minnesota to let him go potty and he kinda forgot I was walking him. I had to sit my butt down in the snow and got a ride for about 5 feet before he looked back and grinned. Oh yeah, you're here. Doh.

I gave them a kitten for Christmas one year and the dog was being introduced, but I knew my son was doing it wrong by the way the dog was looking at the kitten. "STOP!" I shouted.

"What?!" my son asked.

"Remember the hamster?"

"Oh, yeah." He said covering up the kitten and standing up.

"What about the hamster?" His wife asked.

"You didn't TELL HER?" I deadpanned.

"NO"

I took the cat and went and had a chat with the dog. "Rawcoe, this is MY CAT. I am letting you guys have this cat, but he is NOT a chew toy or a snack. Do you understand me dog?" He had his head somewhat down and submissive and nodded. I took my hand to let him sniff the smell of the cat and me and then pet him and let him sniff all the smells together. "You eat this cat I will rip you apart, dog. You understand me?" He nodded again.

My son objected. But I told him, "If you hadn't shown him the hamster and made all those cutesy little noises and ignored his excitement at his upcoming snack, I wouldn't have to be like this." Poor hamster jumped away in fear from my son's hands and was gone in one gulp.

The cat grew up as the brother of the dawg and they were SO happy together it was wonderful.


BTW --- ONLINE MEETINGS = Anonymous help

ACA is open to anyone who grew up in a dysfunctional family. Now no one gets instructions when their kids are born, so most anyone qualifies. But you can also look at the literature and see if there is any hope for you in their ideas. AND if not, there is probably a 12 Step group, free and anonymous for just about any issue you can think of. So don't despair.


https://adultchildren.org/meeting-search/


Mental Health group NAMI has online support. I haven't gone to their groups, but check out their literature and see if it seems helpful.
**NOTE I know people who go and have found them helpful, just have not personally gone there. I did MDMDA back when it was around.

https://namimn.org/support/nami-minnesota-support-groups/



DON'T GIVE UP.

PUT ON YOUR OWN AIR MASK BEFORE HELPING OTHERS. You can't help if you can't breathe.


Ta'

Tigress