Mental Health Support

OldBaldy1701E

(6,832 posts)

17. He recently 'lost' his sister to a church.

Sun Dec 8, 2024, 07:44 PM

Dec 8

She now wants to act embarrassed if he calls and she is with one or more of her brood. They also loaned us some money recently when the car broke down. They (she and her husband) told us that it was fine and that there was no hurry to pay them back. (She married into money anyway. They could afford it.) Suddenly they were both giving him grief about repaying it. We managed to repay them and now they seem to not want to talk to him. She called on Thanksgiving, but he did not take the call. She is the only immediate family he has left. They had lost touch when he was a teen and he had been so pleased that they had reconnected and were building a new relationship. Now they are acting like assholes.

I can't fix this either. I can't do anything for myself or anyone else. He needs me (not as much as I need him, but he does) and I am failing him again.

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So, since you folks are the only people I talk to other than my husband... [View all] OldBaldy1701E Dec 8 OP

so how can you love someone who treats you like crap? NoRethugFriends Dec 8 #1

He is also going through some really bad things. OldBaldy1701E Dec 8 #4

I've often wondered the same thing. It's like they are two very different things, but I don't see them that way. Biophilic Dec 8 #2

It is interesting that you say this. OldBaldy1701E Dec 8 #11

No, not too much to ask. Biophilic Dec 9 #31

huggggggs. Sometimes it just hurts too much to cry. One is afraid that, once niyad Dec 8 #3

I have been grappling with that thought. OldBaldy1701E Dec 8 #22

I'm sorry wryter2000 Dec 8 #5

Yep. OldBaldy1701E Dec 8 #13

I felt that way living in Maryland Wicked Blue Dec 8 #18

Hehe, we are opposites. OldBaldy1701E Dec 8 #23

Just re-watched Stutz on Netflix. He has a tool for this. mahina Dec 8 #6

And maybe if it's right telling him you're extracting yourself from the conversation because you won't be spoken to that mahina Dec 8 #7

I don't have the answer XanaDUer2 Dec 8 #8

A hug right back to you! (n/t) OldBaldy1701E Dec 8 #14

Does he have a doctor? multigraincracker Dec 8 #9

We both need to see one. OldBaldy1701E Dec 8 #15

Call the social worker at senior cntr XanaDUer2 Dec 8 #16

I understand. Try this, look up CBT for anxiety to start with. multigraincracker Dec 8 #25

I'm so sorry to hear about your current situation. MLAA Dec 8 #10

He recently 'lost' his sister to a church. OldBaldy1701E Dec 8 #17

Oh, sweetheart! In my experience you cannot fix another person or persons! MLAA Dec 8 #20

Is there a senior center near you? SheltieLover Dec 8 #12

Guess what? OldBaldy1701E Dec 8 #19

Well, you could talk to your doc about him. SheltieLover Dec 8 #21

may I ask your age bracket, are you anywhere near Medicare eligibility? Skittles Dec 8 #26

Not yet. OldBaldy1701E Dec 9 #28

actually the initial age for Medicare is still 65 Skittles Dec 9 #30

Quick clarification. OldBaldy1701E Dec 8 #24

Take a deep breath, smile, and say " You may be right". And move on... No Vested Interest Dec 9 #27

That is basically what I did. OldBaldy1701E Dec 9 #29

How are you today? Nt XanaDUer2 Dec 9 #32

Trying to act like I am in the holiday spirit while falling behind on getting stuff done. OldBaldy1701E Dec 10 #33

I'm so sorry XanaDUer2 Dec 11 #34

Thanks. OldBaldy1701E Dec 11 #35