just spoke with my uncle and my cousin

[fizzgig]

she told me she'd called her doc to see how many pills she could take without hurting herself and that set off the chain of events. she told me it was to 'get all the bad stuff out.' when i asked her what that bad stuff was, she said it was all the stuff who makes her feel that way. we talked for about a half hour and it doesn't seem that they're doing much to help her right now, they've got her on the eating disorder floor while she waits for a bed on the mood disorder floor to open up. all she is getting is a couple short group sessions a day where basically someone talks at them, no team building, no coping techniques. the only meds she's getting right now is ativan at night and she said it's making her tired all day and she's been doing a lot of sleeping. she's not going to be able to see a doc about daily meds until monday and she has a hearing on tuesday, presumably to determine if it's appropriate to discharge her, but she's not exactly sure.

my uncle and i had the longest conversation we've ever had and while he said some stupid shit (mostly the fact he told her friends to walk away because they should take care of themselves and shouldn't have to deal with it), but it sounds like they've gone to visit her already, he seems to be a bit more enlightened about it than i'd originally thought he would be. my uncle told me she got pissed when he told her that her mom was coming too, i asked her about it and she told me she thinks her parents are terrible people. i wouldn't go as far as to say that, but they are certainly neurotic and un-understanding in their own way. apparently her mom makes cracks about how she's being so bipolar and tells her not to be that way. i reassured her they love her and want her to be ok, but she said she didn't care.

i shared with her every piece of advice i could. she's allergic to lamictal and stopped the lithium because it made her fuzzy. i don't know what other options exist, but i hope they're able to find a good combo and that she realizes that it will vastly improve her quality of life. but med roulette is so hard and she's young enough that her brain is still undergoing some development.

she sounded so sad, tired and a bit scared. i told her and her dad to call me anytime if they needed to talk.

she's a good girl and i'm going to be her staunchest advocate.