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[matt819]

27. Of course, we don't know all the details

Age, issues, etc.

So, with that caveat. . .

Sometimes children can be dicks, too. And they don't have the years behind them that their parents do in dealing with their own challenges, as people and as parents. And most children, whether kids, teens, or adults, certainly lack a filter when it comes to judging their parents. So consider that.

As for the name change - that's just dickishness. But as much as we as parents - fathers, especially - have this desire to pass their name along to their progeny, the name doesn't define you, or them, or their offspring. It is their decency, the stability of their moral compass, etc., that define them. In their late twenties and early thirties, my kids show no signs of planning to settle down and/or have children. Does it bug me in the "passing my name along" department? A little. But that's not terribly important in the big picture. Would it hurt if they hurled that at me as your son has done to you? Probably. But to be crushed? I would hope not. But I realize that there's probably a lot more that we don't know you and your kids, so that attack probably has more meaning to you.

As a friend of mine told me recently in response to a rant about how my life sucks, etc. - Breathe.