Thank you so much!

[get the red out]

15. Thank you

Coming off Effexor is wretched! I never managed to do anything to myself that left me feeling that physically bad even back in my misspent, alcohol fueled youth. The last two weeks are literally a blur, and I haven't had a drink in almost 25 years. I am finding it difficult to believe that taking something as prescribed, then weaning off of it, can mimic a giant binge, so I keep reminding myself that I am not drunk.

The emotional reactivity is awful too. 0 to 60 on a hopeless scale in less that 5 minutes, then back.

But getting that useless to me medication out of my system has STILL left me in better shape mentally than I was when I was still taking it. I think it ceased helping me at least a year ago, maybe more, and I am starting to wonder if it left me less able to understand that my condition was not right, and that it wasn't my fault. I think that shit zombied me into helplessness because the alternative I was offered was upping the Effexor, so I went with that, rinse repeat. My new Dr gives me a lot of hope that we can find something that really helps me and isn't so dangerous to come off of. She prescribed a drug used to help cancer patients get through sickness caused by Chemo to help me while detoxing from Effexor and thank God, I was just sick of throwing up, vertigo, little electric shocks racing across my skin, chills then sweating......