Hi this is my first time I've felt comfortable

[wendyb-NC]

18. Thank you, for sharing.

It helps to reach out. Please, let your doctor know if the highs and lows are a new symptom, for you, or you feel your efforts to get out of the cycle, aren't as effective as you hoped. Six weeks is a long time, without decent sleep. Exhaustion, can alter your ability to function safely, and maintain a sense of equanimity, in daily stuff.

I have experienced depression and anxiety, much of my life. I was formally diagnosed twenty years ago. I am "stable" at this point, and remain on an antidepressant. When I tried to quit the medication, a few years ago, I became very erratic, in terms of my emotions. I stopped because I lost the 4th job in 3 years, had no income nor health insurance.
I was relatively new in town and had not found a doctor, at that point. The doctor where I lived previously was able to help, until I could find health care agencies, locally who would see me without money or insurance. I know the sense of desperation, loss of a sense of personal integrity, feeling,disenfranchised, a loss worth, as a person. It took several months to find the right agency that fit my needs. I had to keep myself centered and a push forward.

My heart goes out to you, these things are so multifaceted, but find your center in a flow of peace and clarity. Your strong, be determined to get better and back to your native self. I sure hope you do.