Please universe - help me have a better relationship with my coworker... [View all]
When a person treats me badly, I usually spend a lot of time soul-searching and evaluating my behavior and itemizing my faults and all the reasons that person is justified in being frustrated with me, or judging me, or hating me, or treating me with disrespect. I know I make a lot of mistakes and I’m sure I can be very annoying.
It’s been the hardest lesson for me to learn – and I still don’t know this in my heart – that I don’t have to be perfect or beyond reproach to deserve to be treated well. I have faults and make mistakes and can surely be a frustrating person to know – but if a person spends all day making snide comments about me and my work and speaking to me disrespectfully, that person is a bitch. Not everyone has to like me, but everyone does have to treat me with respect.
I stood up for myself today. I had to. I’ll tell you, I don’t really feel better. I feel anxious and guilty and sick. I resent being in this situation.
The world is hard enough and full of enough ugliness - why do people have to create more of that?
I don’t know how to let go and not let it bother me – the constant derision. This person cannot be removed from my environment, and the only way I can remove myself is to give up something I love and don’t want to give up.
I am asking for strength and serenity.
Please universe, I did not stand up for myself to escalate the situation – please let things be better tomorrow. And please let my actions serve love and peace and truth and help keep me from hating back.
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