Not sure what I am feeling.. some calm...maybe a little more balanced, but I have to work really hard to keep my footing. Also dealing with a lot of physical pain so that if I get a spurt of energy, it is very difficult to act on it.
I keep trying to open my heart, to love and to allow myself to feel love.. but I am feeling what seems like the echoes of past feelings and still wondering if I have ever really loved.
The best that I can do, I guess, is to stay alert and to stay conscious of my choices as I make them. Little lessons keep popping up... stuff I can finally see and make choices about. But I am still feeling pretty numb..except that I am very happy for you all, who are feeling this beautiful stuff...and who are riding the wave of love and consciousness.. I guess that is what I will be doing.. I guess I will be waving as you all fly forth....
P.S. Just noticed that I am also feeling a little wistful
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