Really struggling at 15 months out with losing my husband

[NJCher]

8. Just have to comment on this

I go overboard. I am a total nut about it. I am not suggesting anyone else do this because most people are abhorred by this practice. Here is what I do:

I have a worksheet for every day. On the worksheet, I have indoor spaces and outdoor spaces blocked out.

Example:

Outdoor

Parking area
Front garden
Front patio
Back deck
Upstairs raised beds
Greenhouse
Side raised beds
Side work area/patio

Indoor

Living room
Office
Dining room
Bedroom
Butlers pantry
Kitchen
Bath
Back entry
Front entry
Side entry


I go to each area and spend 10 or 15 minutes cleaning it and organizing it.

When done, it gets a checkmark.

Every 45” I get a reward of 10” reading time or chatting with a friend or relative.

I also record how I spent my time all day, like “grocery shopping” or “doctor’s appts.”

I keep all the worksheets in notebooks so I can tell you exactly what I was doing on what day and what time.

This is in addition to my job, which I mostly get to schedule whenever I want to do it. Oh, and also my focus exercises, which take an hour each day.

I got the idea to do this from a friend whose husband is a noted psychiatrist. She edited his books. From that I learned that he thought we all needed an organizer. An “organizer” is just one thing to anchor ourselves to each day. For my friend Linda, it was running. She ran 45” a day.

I rarely get every box checked off on my worksheet. Whatever area didn’t get a check gets priority the next day. I don’t give myself a hard time if I don’t get it all done; it’s merely a tool to spread my time around productively.