Coping with Divorce or Separation

a kennedy

(32,331 posts)

36. Wow, i'm writing this in 2022 !!!!!

Wed Apr 13, 2022, 08:01 PM

Apr 2022

I know it’s over.....no counseling is gonna help. Thing is.....he’s getting really bad in the mental department, he’s 76 I’m 72. He’s driving me nuts with how long it takes him to do stuff. ANYTHING really, I call him a Putz. Hard to explain really, he takes forever to do just the easiest tasks. I feel terrible at even thinking of leaving him......no kids between us. He does have a wonderful daughter by a previous marriage and she is married but they have no kids either, so really I have no connection to him outside of our 42 year marriage. I think I am a horrible wife to not love him more at his declining state. I think i’ve got problems because i’m not trying to help him through his failings. Why am I not his partner and try to help him through his declining health and mind. So right now, I’m thinking either divorce or suicide. Not much of a choice is it. We have NOTHING in common anymore. NOTHING. I don't Know what to do. I feel I have no one to talk to either. Friends have no idea how i’m feeling, family either. My sister, and my best friend are gone, both have died. I’m at my end. Marriage wise AND my life.

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Knowing when to walk away. [View all] a la izquierda Apr 2014 OP

My advice and it's a bit off topic Sherman A1 Apr 2014 #1

Thank you. a la izquierda Apr 2014 #2

Best to You Sherman A1 Apr 2014 #3

Yeah, it's much more wrenching with kids villager Apr 2014 #6

This stuff is awesome for stress. Makes you feel better in mahina Dec 2019 #28

yes self care is so important during breakups nowandlater Feb 2020 #31

It can be worked through and you have to let your friends and family know you need ... marble falls Feb 2020 #32

I know this is late Rorey Feb 2020 #35

The question to ask yourself is the old advice columnist question: SheilaT Apr 2014 #4

I strongly suggest he be in therapy and you both empire we are Apr 2014 #5

That's a tough one laundry_queen May 2014 #7

when it's time to leave~ Chimeradog Aug 2014 #8

I filed when I realized it was never going to get better, only worse and worse Demeter Mar 2015 #9

Thanks. a la izquierda Mar 2015 #10

It took me 8 years to decide Demeter Mar 2015 #11

Start pulling down those bricks. SheilaT Mar 2015 #12

I'll be 68 in January 2019 duhneece Dec 2018 #25

A new start is always better.. tiffinynelson Apr 2015 #13

Hello ~ tiffinynelson In_The_Wind Apr 2015 #14

I am in a similar situation bighart Jun 2015 #15

Without knowing more than what you've posted, SheilaT Jun 2015 #16

Thank you for the reply bighart Jun 2015 #17

Clearly you got married young. SheilaT Jun 2015 #18

I think in many ways I have done her a disservice bighart Jun 2015 #21

Do push her very hard to get a job. SheilaT Jun 2015 #22

I'm sorry for you... a la izquierda Jun 2015 #19

Thank you. bighart Jun 2015 #20

A la izquierda, please read my post about the stress mahina Dec 2019 #29

Coping with Divorce or Separation 01stworldview Feb 2017 #23

There's some very good advice in this thread mnhtnbb Feb 2018 #24

It's a balance sheet (or was for me;) elleng Dec 2018 #26

The tip I got was to ask myself if there was one thing I loved about her to sacrifice ... marble falls Feb 2020 #34

Life is too short to be unhappy and not enjoy marrage kimbutgar Dec 2018 #27

I'm just revisiting this thread. a la izquierda Dec 2019 #30

Do what you need to end the stress. Use counciling to fix the stress and not go over the ... marble falls Feb 2020 #33

Wow, i'm writing this in 2022 !!!!! a kennedy Apr 2022 #36