Rape culture is real. I was born into it.

[geek tragedy]

My dad is by all outwards signs a down the line liberal. Votes straight ticket Democratic in a deep red state, favors taxing the rich, social spending, pro-choice and marriage equality, etc. For all I would know, he could post at DU and fit right in.

Recently, he asked my radical feminist wife (a term she embraces proudly) in a discussion he started about professional athletes and 'groupies':

To what extent are the women responsible for provoking a rape?

She showed extraordinary restraint, asking (in a slightly elevated tone) "are you suggesting that some women deserve to be raped?" He was in the midst of a mealy-mouthed reply when the conversation was interrputed (thankfully).

I wish I could say I was surprised--but I wasn't. He's pushing 70, and while he's evolved through his life on some issues, on that issue he's still a damn caveman. No, he's not a potential rapist (especially at this age), he's not ostensibly a misogynist according to the more obvious measures, doesn't buy into gender stereotypes etc. But, he still retains the rape culture baggage he picked up growing up in a backwards, socially conservative area. My siblings and I have tried to correct his thinking on this issue, but at this point it's pretty clear he's never gonna change on the issue. Just have to hope he stops talking about it and never gets called to serve on a jury for a sexual assault/rape prosecution.