My own version. (a warning that there may be triggers here)

[Voice for Peace]

9. I too had a difficult time identifying my childhood experiences

even though my memories were vivid, I was never
physically overpowered or violently abused. It was subtle
and it was dark and it was dirty and it went on for years.
I loathed my body, I was numb, and I knew that
no matter how hard I tried to be a good person, deep
down I was bad, wrong, ugly, and undeserving.
I starved and scarred and burned and cut myself, I
tried to die.

It seems the long-term effects are nearly universal for
survivors of sexual abuse, whether the abuse was violent
and traumatic, or ongoing and less easy to identify, or
even in cases where the child is a "willing" participant..
there are common manifestations, lifelong impact.

I relate to so much of what you wrote, thank you.
Healing, and learning, it's taking me a lifetime.
At 60 I am feeling what most children feel toward sex.
"Ew, gross"

I had tucked those feelings far away, deep in my
bones. They're working their way to the surface,
along with the many tears. Takes a lifetime.