Borowitz: "It will be jarring having a President without a raging personality disorder."

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4. Kick

Unskilled Man Fears He Will Lose Job in Recession
By Andy Borowitz
August 20, 2019



WASHINGTON (The Borowitz Report) — A man with no identifiable skills is deeply worried that a recession could cause him to lose his job, people close to the man have confirmed.

The man, who has barely clung to his job for the past two and a half years, is justified in believing that an economic downturn would result in his unemployment, experts said.

“When the economy is good, it’s possible for someone like him to hold down a job for which he is woefully unqualified,” Harland Dorrinson, a human-resources specialist, said. “But when the economy goes south, look out.”