Everything was pretty good and we were friendly until we started to split the assets. There is a formula the courts use which takes into account years of marriage, both parties past earnings and earning potential, etc., and divides up accordingly. My ex interpreted division as me "taking his stuff" and I ended up having to get an attorney.
We really haven't spoken much since then, as he still has anger issues. But all in all I think ex must be happier now and I'm happy for him. He has a girlfriend he seems to have a lot in common with and recently purchased a house with her. I also have a house and am so much happier. Not interested in dating yet, and not sure I ever will be, but it was such a relief.
My advice is: try to go through mediation first and be prepared to give up half your marriage estate. Just take it for granted that your life will never be the same but it will eventually be better for everyone.
My only regret through it all was that I didn't do it ten years sooner because that's when the marriage was over.
By the time I got my final divorce decree, I felt nothing, no sadness. It was just like putting a period on the end of a sentence to signify an end to something.
Good luck.
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